They’re Out To Get Me…

Y’know, I noticed a peculiar phenomenon today in my wee ones. Typically, my daughter is the dominant and aggressive one between the two of them. Makes sense I suppose: she’s older, had more attention before her brother came along, doesn’t like sharing, and her brother just wants absolutely everything she is holding. So, yeah, okay sure, I might be a tad bit of a bully if I had those problems going on with the addition of a three year old lizard brain. I mean, I have a hard time sharing attention with my wife between her work and school and stuff, but the only difference is I don’t get her attention by stealing her toys and growling at her like a feral beast (unless she asks me to).

However, today was different. Today REX was the aggressor! He was chasing Princess around screaming trying to rip her blankie out of her hands and then proceeded to hit her when she said that she didn’t want to share it. Like holy guacamole on a soggy corn tortilla chip man! I was about to sell him to the circus!

So between me and him butting heads and putting him in timeout, I noticed that Princess was abnormally pleasant towards me. She came up and gave me hugs, she was cleaning up her toys, she was sitting nicely and listening to Christmas songs on the radio (I KNOW ITS NOT DECEMBER YET, BUT I AM WEAK AND EXCITABLE SO CUT ME SOME SLACK) and overall just being nice. It was odd because she normally acts out to get my attention in a negative manner. The quickest way for daddy to pay attention to me is to piss him off. At first I thought she was being sweet because I stood up for her to her younger brother who was terrorizing her…but then the realization hit me.

THEY

ARE

PLAYING

MIND

GAMES

WITH

ME!!!!

It all makes perfect sense! They have obviously coordinated a double assault on my sanity where one of them will be sweet and the other nasty so I don’t know what temperament I’m supposed to assume in their presence.

It was just Rex’s turn to play bad cop today! As Princess pleasantly got praise and hugs from me for behaving, her brother magically stopped being the tyrannosaurus terror he was donning and then was all love and hugs.

Little emotional terrorists.

I’m on to you!

Beware my fellow grumps, children know how to make you lose your mind! But anyways, you guys rock and I hope you have a lovely Thanksgiving if you’re reading this from the USA. and if you’re not, then I hope next week is just as lovely anyways!

Until next time folks: stay grumpy, stay safe, and, above all else,

Stay grumpy.